


My Lungs Will Fill and then Deflate

by xoxoKiTtYxoxo



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Fluff, M/M, basically attempted self harm, good enough, slight self harm, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-02
Updated: 2015-07-02
Packaged: 2018-04-06 01:51:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4203417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xoxoKiTtYxoxo/pseuds/xoxoKiTtYxoxo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes Josh is the one who needs consoling. And Tyler is more than willing to give him the support he needs.</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Lungs Will Fill and then Deflate

**Author's Note:**

> I was feeling a bit depressed and anxious so I wrote this.  
> Also: I saw an interview and Josh said that he had anxiety about Tyler actually kicking him out of the band for real. Although, I could be mixing this up, so please correct me if I'm wrong.

_I ponder of something great. My lungs will fill and then deflate. They fill with fire, exhale desire. I know it' s dire, my time today._

The panic spread through his entire body; first starting in his chest, then expanding into his arms and legs. Josh's legs shook so hard that he resorted to pulling into the corner of a parking lot to wrap his arms around himself. Short huffs of breath exited his mouth rapidly and his face was red. His fingers clenched and unclenched against his shirt  Black dots clouded Josh's vision. 

Josh's phone rang in the passenger seat but he just ignored it.The walls felt like they were closing in on him. He couldn't move; not if he didn't want to get crushed. 

A few minutes later Josh's phone sounded again. Then for a third time two minutes after that. 

_I have these thoughts so often I ought to replace a slot with what I just bought. 'Cause somebody stole my car radio and now I just sit in silence._

Josh's phone went off for a fourth time but cut off two rings in. A rapid tap on the window made Josh jump, but he didn't look up. 

_Sometimes quiet is violent._

josh began to dig at the skin on his forearms with his blunt nails. 

"Josh! Josh, open the door. Unlock the car for me!" A voice that sounded faintly like Tyler's echoed outside of the car. But that can't be right, Tyler was home with his family. Josh was all alone. He didn't have anyone to save him, and it was okay because he didn't need anyone. He could take care of himself, take care of his own anxiety. Tyler wouldn't help him with it anyways if he was kicked out of the band. 

_I ponder of something terrifying, 'cause this time there is no sound to hide behind. Defined over the course of a human existence and one thing consists of consistence.  
_

"Josh! Josh, come on, open the door." A hand hit the window. Josh noticed the tattoo on the wrist, just like Tyler's. "Josh! It's me, it's Tyler! Open the door!" 

_And it's that we are all battling fear. Oh dear, I don't know if we know why we're here. Oh my, too deeply, stop thinking, I liked it better when my car had sound._

Josh thrust his shaky hand towards the handle. He pulled but his body was so spastic that it wouldn't open. "Josh, just press the lock button." Suddenly, Joshes senses went into overdrive. He gripped the door handle while the feeling of suffocation surrounded him. A sharp tug and a push later, Josh was being pulled out of his car by someone. This someone was a few inches taller then he, like Tyler. 

_There are things we can, but from the things that work there are only two. There's faith and there's sleep._

"Tyler is going to kick me out of the band. Leave me alone, I can take care of myself." Josh pushed himself away from the body and blinked rapidly. His vision was getting darker and darker. 

"Josh, Josh you need to breath. Hey- hey breath with me okay?" The person pulled Josh close and placed Josh's hand on his chest. "Do you feel that, that's my heart. You need to breath and focus on it. Breath with me Josh. 1 2 3-" Josh gripped onto the person holding onto him. Fingers threaded into cloth. His eyes scanned over everything in front of him. He noticed the distinctive tattoos that only belonged to Tyler. 

"Tyler?" The arms pulled him closer. 

"Hi Josh. Just breath, okay? Just breath for me." Tyler moved his right hand so it was on Josh's lower back. He took a few deep breaths, hoping Josh would follow-suit. 

_I have these thoughts so often I ought to replace that slot with what I once bought. 'Cause somebody stole my car radio and now I just sit in silence._

Josh closed his eyes and listened to Tyler's breathing. Soon enough, the two were breathing in sync and Josh didn't have spots surrounding his vision anymore.

"I'm not going to kick you out of the band. I promise I won't kick you out of the band." Tyler whispered over and over into Josh's ear. "I promise you aren't going to get kicked out of the band."

_I ponder of something great. My lungs will fill and then deflate. They fill with fire, exhale desire. I know it's dire, my time today._

_I have these thoughts so often I ought to replace that slot with what I just bought. 'Cause somebody stole my car radio and now I just sit in silence._

**Author's Note:**

> This was a potato story. Don't mind my potato story.


End file.
